Went for my u/s today. I guess I shouldn't be too upset, it is still early, but I'm sort of disappointed. I was showing 5 good-sized follicles on my left side (ranging from 7-9 mm, which is good). But the 4 on my right are tiny (3-5 mm). Even if they all develop and can be retrieved that's only 9 eggs, assuming all of them grow. I know ladies who get upwards into the 20-30 range. I was so hopeful that we'd get enough for another try if this one doesn't work out for us. Knowing the attrition rate in the lab (around 50%), we could have only a few when it comes time to transfer - but I guess I shouldn't complain about that. Quality is better than quantity, when it comes to embies.
I read a women's post on the Resolve website yesterday - she had 20 embryos the day of her retrieval, and none of them made it to transfer. Devastating. How to women (including myself) keep coming back for more of this? This desire for babies, for a family - it is crazy powerful. I feel like there is a force pushing me to keep going no matter how hard it gets, how tired, fat and bloated I am, no matter how many holes they pricked me full of. It is nuts.
I'm waiting for lab results for the afternoon. I am praying that my estradiol goes up. With the low number of follicles I am producing, and the whole estradiol being on the low side, my fears of getting cancelled are looming large again . . .
-kelly
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